KISS ME KATE at the Stolen Shakespeare Guild

I’m going to pretend to be a drama critic.  I can’t sew, neither can I reap.  Nail two boards together?  Once I tried to spit into an enemy’s eye: I missed her and hit her mother instead. She kicked me very hard. I don’t need another beating. I am inept, get it? How much longer do I need to explain?

Carol and I took in this production of KISS ME KATE at the Fort Worth Cultural Box. Generally speaking, the production had a beginning and middle and an end. Let me modify that: the show nearly did not have a beginning — It went up late — five minutes? Show just don’t go up on time anymore. Just add it to the handbasket in which this world is riding to hell.

I liked the following 3-6 actors: Lauren Morgan (Vanessi); Daron Cockerell (Lane); JaceSon Barrua (Fred); in other words, the leads. I leave out Tillman (Lucentio) purely out of spite. No, ha, ha! Just kidding! But John does seem a bit self-conscious when he dances: like “lookie me! I can’t dance either!” Just hoof it, for Presley’s sake, John! You’ll be forgiven eventuslly.

The Thugs seemed to have timing problems. I could see raw meat broiling hot and steamy between the two, but no cooking, despite the strange metaphor.

Stephanie Glenn and Amy Adkins were able to grease down all the actors enough so that they could slip and slide so gracefully through the production numbers.

Do you need to know the story?  A touring company performs TAMING of the SHREW as a musical.  The actor’s romantic lives run in  parallel with their Shakespearean counterparts. Enough levels and layers here to keep a Wittgenstein fan up all night with his hand in the peanut butter jar.

I assume Mary Helen Atkins was the “orchestra.” So proficient as an accompanist, she could have assembled a bologna sandwich for me while playing the piano and she would not miss a note.

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From Mr. Mark’s Greatest Wretchings

My former Match.com profile.  Retired Oct 29, 2008.

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People have deemed me a saucy creature, a wit of no common degree, a pantaloon, a brigand, a piece of eight. When sat upon, I will spout knowledge mixed with balderdash. I smoke not, neither do I drink. Occasionally I receive benevolent messages from outer space — out-of-date stock tips, mostly — a fixed speed of light wrecks havoc with instantaneous communication.

Have you heard of SETI? It’s a research project for radio astronomers trying to find patterns in space doodle picked up by radio telescopes. A pattern may mean sentient life in space. On the other hand, some of the garbage could be extra-terresstial dirty jokes. Humor so vile that alien broadcasters must hide it within cosmic drivel. Unhappily we must know what these space creatures look like as well as their mating habits if we are ever to learn what is funny about the jokes.

Does a week go by without me seeing a movie at the cine-haus or the GooglePlex? No. Want to shut me up? Put me in front of a book.

Restaurants have that smell, taste, sight and sound thing going with them, so take me out to eat! I see a lot of plays and I like to people watch. Every morning I enjoy a nice hot bath with soap and coffee.

Women with whom I enjoy mutual trust tend to possess a massive dose of whimsey. They also gather in the whole world from juicy dawn to the final smoke of one AM. All things being equal, I would prefer a woman with access to ground transportation.

I refuse to enter the soap bar versus bubble bath debate. Whichever your preference for that particular day. Please avoid anything cocoanut, if possible, if you can swing it. It’s not all that important.

I’d like to buy you a soft drink or coffee, perhaps wth any non-coconut pie or cake slice. We have several fine establishments in the Greater Dallas/Ft. Worth area.

I am an Actor, Writer, Teacher, Bon Vivant and Raconteur. I make a living as a Software Engineer. I live in an apartment, drive a small car and have no plans to climb Mt. Everest.

Do you play a musical instrument that weighs less than 35 pounds? Are you a mezzo-soprano? Mezzo anything? How many tricky ballet moves can you execute without twisting or breaking a bone? Have you memorized any Shakespeare? His sonnets are first rate! You are free to memorize any speech from the plays whether spoken by male, female, beast, deity, angel or potted plant. We can gather together a crowd at a fine Ft. Worth park, and present a free performing chaos concert with me as bon vivant, emcee, impessario and YOU as the talent. Accompany yourself in SWAN LAKE: cello would be nice. Stand on your cellist’s chair and bring an 8×10 glossy with you, please.

Mister Mark Comes To Terms

Find the perfect combination of pharmaceuticals – prescription only. Supplements from health food stores – very effective if you know where to look

 How do men have sex with each other anyway? Ever figure that one out? It is beyond me. Maybe they do something with dolls or something. All your life you’re told “don’t play with dolls” then they pull this sex thing on us. Sex with women is so complicated. All those pulleys and winches and scaffolding.. That and the ever present repair manual.

 Sex with another man? I talked about it one time with a guy I knew. We shared a cubicle at work. We had tons of work to do, contacts with the United States government, but we still had time to discuss life – especially after going out together to lunch for three martinis and one of his son’s marijuana cigarettes. After you share a joint with a man five days a week for 11 months, you get to know him pretty well. So we toyed with the idea of going all the way… what is all the way between two guys? Where do you put the “Thing” and for how long?  We both found this taxing so we decided just to remain friends.

Home Fire Works

Another post on the legendary WordPress.com: I am chilled.  Trepidation haunts my thinking when I contemplate my whole blog disintegrating into quarks and strange attractors.  This is way way undercompensated by the strong urge to purge, i.e., to lay my gifts at your feet — whoever you are.  I want to show what I have to offer and this is my platform 30000 feet off the ground and I fall on a spear left from one of the former wars — a javelin from a track meet.

We are staying in for Fireworks: no desire does either of us have to fight hellish Texaco Heat nor tangle with a crowd or two.  We  have a wonderous firework display planned for inside our home.  Our ceiling is tall enough and we have enough room for an 1812 Orchestra — they are in the master bedroom now.  The cannon just went off — I need my helmet and flack jacket.  Join the 1812 Overture later?